ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
false alarm, still single
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
