So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
