how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
This is the high leading the old right now
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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