On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
