peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
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