Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
