Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
