we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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