Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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