Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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