Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
