Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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