No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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