i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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