we're chasing vodka with high fives
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
