Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize