oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
