I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Randomize
