and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
