thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Everyone says I win the strip club
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
