i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
