She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
