last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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