I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Randomize
