You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
