She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
