Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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