How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
