Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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