I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
