guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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