She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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