hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize