You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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