So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize