please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
