My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
