the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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