plz talk dirty to me
my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
