can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
