Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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