PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
