I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize