I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
She's the barista slut.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
