Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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