return my video game
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
