Sry I called you an 8
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
She told me I should be a condom model.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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