Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
