Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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