you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
